crane

Welcome to My Journal

Welcome to my journal. I'm putting this at the top so folks can find things easily. There are so many years' worth of stuff on this journal that it's not that easy to find things. I started out just journaling, but then got into writing fiction as well.

First, trip journals. They're all family friendly. You can also just click the travel tag as well to see everything related to it.

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  • Current Mood: accomplished accomplished
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crane

That Is Not The Obstacle You're Looking For

I have a dream. It is not a Martin Luther King Jr. type dream, sadly.

There are no people, there is no place, no objects, nothing to see, nothing to hear, no smells, touch, or even the perception of having a body. All there is despair, the weight of it smothering me, taking all my breath, spirit, and heart literally and figuratively. I am dying in that dream, snuffed out without intent on whatever is destroying me. There's nothing to fight. Nothing I could do against it even if I had a body to fight with. The interesting thing for me is that this is concrete proof that I can conceive of myself as an abstract being entirely independent of body. The essential me negated.
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  • Current Mood: determined determined
crane

Filling My Days

I think the most frustrating thing about trying to heal from overuse problems is that the list of things that I can't do basically makes up most of the "therapy". Given that most of my life has to do with what I can do, not with what I can't, it puts the focus on the wrong thing for me. And sometimes things affect the central condition that had nothing to do with video games.
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crane

Healing

The hard part about resurrection is having to die first. I seem to be in the that Easter frame of mind, and my body has taken matters into its own hands. Around March 10 my left arm felt like it was on fire from my fingertips all the way to my neck, and I stopped playing Team Fortress 2 completely.

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  • Current Mood: frustrated frustrated
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crane

Good Enough

One of those myths of competitive gaming is that you have to be "good enough" to play competitively.

Sure... it's scary and it feels crazy to try out for a team if you think you're terrible at the game, and it's important to try out for a position that you really enjoy playing; but the secret is that you don't have to be that good. What you have to be is willing to get better.

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crane

Soup...

I spent nearly fourteen hours on ramen broth, yesterday. *laughs* I should have taken a picture or three, but it's a slow process.

Momofuku Noodle Bar has a cookbook out that details it's exacting process for making ramen broth, and I follow all the bits but the bacon and I use bonito shavings instead of bacon. I also probably skim a little more fat off the broth than they do, but it's all to the good, and I don't put any salt in it so that when we eat it with our noodles, we add it then.
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  • Current Mood: curious curious
crane

Introverts and Confidentiality

I'm on a search committee for our church and I basically can't talk about much about who we're talking with or some of what we're doing, but the basic idea is to find a pastor for our church and to present our church to pastors so that they can figure out if they'd like to serve us. And we can't talk about them, at all, because they might be working or doing things with their church and no one knows, yet, that they're looking, as that's just how it's done.

But while going through all the profile, someone was incredulous about the number of introverts there were as candidates, and I thought about it a lot.

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crane

They're Talking To Me Again

My characters are talking to me again. It's... kind of cool and kind of troublesome and kind of making me wonder what it is about just putting words to screen that wakes them up again.

Though, to be honest, it was really the asthma that woke Ukitake up, and he was gently encouraging me to breathe slow and deep, to keep control of my breathing rather than letting the coughing take over while I was in my bed in the middle of the night and I really needed more sleep. It worked.

Life and characters and creation is an odd mix.

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