September 4th, 2001


(no subject)

The house is extra quiet, all the dishes clean and tucked into the drying rack, and the extra box of instant oatmeal disappeared from our shelves...

The last couple of days with Mom and Dad were good. I got some interesting thoughts and advice in the last few days, and it's helped. Enjoy them for what they are and not worry too much about what they're not and do what needs to be done. It worked and they had a good last few days, and I have had a less harrowing time of it all.

Jet reflected my changes to an astonishing degree as well, but had his own reservations and intuitions. It astonishes me a little to realize that the little guy does have so many ways to communicate how he feels about situations and interactions and that he, of all people. pulls no punches when he decides he dislikes something and also is all out when he decides he does like something as well.

He likes his grandparents. He got comfortable being with them when he was comfortable and happy and he'd play with them and eat food they fed him and all kinds of stuff. It was interesting noticing, however, that his communication style changed when he was with them. He was much louder about uncomfortable situations and far more persistent about complaining when he could tell it was going to depend on them, and they wouldn't try things. He was also happy to smile and wiggle and play with them when he was happy and they were happy, and that worked out really well when I needed to nap or when John and I got in our first movie for a while.

He's back to his old self with just me even this morning. Early in the morning he started to just cry and I changed his diaper and he stopped. He started crying again, and I tried feeding him and he stopped. He just whimpered a little, and I worked around to just putting him in his exer-saucer and he played away cheerfully. Just now, I'd put him in his crib while I was working this afternoon, and he was playing away and I heard just this grunt. I walked over and found Jet lying on the mattress with his arm twisted behind his back only because he would not let go of the giant Whoozit. It was a pretty badly uncomfortable position, but he'd only grunted the one time and it was enough to bring me and get him untangled without making him give up his toy. He went back to happily playing when I put him back together.

He's very quiet again.

Which makes me wonder if he's such a quiet boy because he hasn't had to be loud to get his needs met. Then again, there's a lot of it just being his personality, too, so I should not get a big head about it all.

It became a very good visit all in all. They had a great time, were very glad of their grandson and had a blast giving him two bathes in his bath tub upstairs, some loud toys, fun evening walks, someone to play with all the time, and lots of food whenever he wanted to eat solids. Jet had fun and ended up, last night, for the first time in months, only waking up once during the night. All without formula. Heh.

The Good Things

So the good things that Mom and Dad did included doing all the dishes without being asked, cooking the first few nights and then asking me what we wanted to do for dinner, together, instead of just assuming. They were good about saying things in a more positive light, and I was impressed when Mom said, "You know, if you really wanted your hair to look better, you'd use a blow dryer." Instead of just telling me to use one.

They were great about being with Jet, and admired him greatly, and we had a great deal of fun with Dad's video camera for Jet's first bath and some other stuff. I managed to just tape a sequence of Jet just playing with John the way the two of them usually go at it. Hopefully that'll entertain Kathy a great deal.

Mom did a lot of really awful diapers, and Dad even changed a diaper for Jet first thing in the morning. Dad was really great about just going up and getting Jet when he heard Jet first thing in the morning. So John and I didn't even really have to get up unless I was really full of milk and Jet was really hungry. But, most of the time, Jet woke up wanting to just play, so he had a great time with Dad and Mom.

One of the more magical moments was when we went to Flatiron Crossing, the big, new mall, and left Mom to buy stuff at Lord and Taylor's, and the four of us, John, Dad, Jet and I went to trek all the way across the mall to Foley's for some Origins things I needed. The walk itself was fun, long, and brightly decorated for Jet's interest, he loved peering into the jewelry cases at all the sparkly things. The three of us were content to just go wherever Jet's interests were aimed at and we had a blast just letting him see and touch lots of new stuff, from custom teddy bears to the jewelry cases, to bouncing and smiling at another baby in a stroller, to going all the way around the waterfall they'd built as part of the mall in the rain.

At Origins, two and then three different makeup ladies all made a very great deal of Jet and he cheerfully smiled, flirted and wiggled for them while they all let me alone to do my shopping and find the things I wanted to buy. That was cool. Then we trekked back, changed him and then headed home.