Liralen Li (liralen) wrote,
Liralen Li

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Worked late tonight, when I was thinking, with all the big stuff that happened early in the week, that it would only be small stuff. But... you guessed it... I was wrong. :-) The big thing on Monday was not too hard; but there were other things that grabbed me and I dealt.

There was one guy in one of the group presentations I made who had his head in his hands over something that was pretty hard to deal with; and he said something that made me think. He said that it seems that the amount of stress one dealt with was directly proportional to the amount of money one got paid. And I think that that is correct in this company and, maybe, in most good companies. That they reward those that do take on more than they're comfortable with. Thing is that I'd never really associated a link between risk-taking and ulcer-making if you get my drift.

So all these other folks that are playing at this higher level are just as stressed and as uncomfortable and as capable of worry as I am, in some ways. Sure, there's some people that appear to just take it all in stride, but now I've worked with some of those folks, heck, I've appeared to BE one of those folks. And I know now that at least some of them actually feel something like I do. And, yes, there are some that just don't worry, like John. But there are enough like me for me to understand that I may be doing it the way others do. That seems right in a root kind of way.

Now what I have to do is just figure out what my balance of this hard stuff is that will pay me what I want to be paid, give me as much real growth as I really want, and still not damage/really hurt me. At least I know some more about the axis I'm playing against, now.
Tags: work

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