Liralen Li (liralen) wrote,
Liralen Li

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Fanfic: Look Up

Title: Look Up
Fandom: Bleach
Pairing: Shuuhei/Kira -- kind of a continuation of "One Thing Only"
Prompt: Sara June Parker -- "May I never miss a sunset or rainbow because I am looking down."
Word Count: 1024
Rating: R -- for nudity and boy-kisses.
A/N: This is a speedfic, unbeta'ed with calmingeffects for one of the comm manager's birthdays, so this is going to stay locked until said birthday; but we wanted to remember April and write something under time pressure and on our own. Many thanks to calming for kicking my sorry ass so that I'd just *WRITE*. It is not beta'ed yet. I may update this when it is beta'ed or when it's released to the comm.

After their training session, Shuuhei and Kira saw to the proper dispersal of all their people. The two fukutaichou went to their own dining rooms and each of them ate with their people, making sure that morale was up and everyone knew their places for the battle in the coming days. No one was quite sure exactly which day Aizen would go to Kurakura, but the plan was known up and down the ranks, and everyone and every Division made their own adjustments.

Finally, when things were settled, Shuuhei headed over to the quarters of the Third Division and found Kira sprawled across his bed, snoring, but still sticky with sweat from the day, his blond hair stuck nearly solid, his uniform still on. Shuuhei chuckled tiredly and shook Kira's shoulder.

"Huh? Oh." Kira rubbed his eyes. "It's you. Did I fall asleep?"

"Yeah, you did. I'd like to join you, but I can't while I'm this filthy. It'll be faster if you help in the bath." Shuuhei said with a grin.

Kira laughed softly, "I don't know if it'll be faster, but it would certainly be more enjoyable. Good thing the officer's quarters have more private baths."

Shuuhei headed toward the bath, gently towing Kira along by the hand. Kira looked as worn out as he felt. Both of them should rest some before the actual battle so they'd be strong enough for the day. He wondered if Kira had shared one of these more private baths with Ichimaru, before the betrayal; but he couldn't quite bring himself to ask. The blond's blue eyes were only for him, and he didn't want to bring back bad memories for Kira.

But that brought along his own memories. The times in the garden with Tousen, talking over the philosophies of the gentle man. The ideas had fed a hungry boy who had known nothing but violence and pain. The idea that there could be something better, something more aware of all the damage a sword could do not only to its victim but also its welder had caught the imagination of a boy who'd seen both how well and how badly warriors could behave. That those who pursued violence for its own sake or as a power over others were themselves ruined by it made sense to him. The blind man had an easy sell in the value of peace to a youngster who had proved usually good at war, and Shuuhei had dedicated himself to protecting the peace with his whole soul.

But with the betrayal, Shuuhei's understanding of himself had exploded. All the trust in Tousen, in his ideas, his philosophies were suddenly suspect. And it unsettled and hurt Shuuhei that the ground he felt he'd always stood on had cracked and fallen from under his feet. But, gradually, he'd come to some measure of peace about that as well. That just because the man had done things that he could not agree with didn't mean that all the ideas, and more importantly, the body of the ideals themselves were incorrect in and of themselves. It was just that Tousen was the hypocrite. Not that Shuuhei was a fool for believing, himself, that better things were possible.

He sighed and Kira frowned at him. "What are you thinking, Shuuhei?"

"Nothing much." Shuuhei gave Kira a smile, but the blond looked concerned and reached up to trace the scars on his cheek. And suddenly Shuuhei's memories weren't quite as important as the man who stood right in front of him.

"Your eyes are so dark."

He grinned wryly and ducked his head. "They always are."

He tugged Kira into the bath room. He opened the taps to fill the tub, even as Kira sat on the washing bench and stripped with quick, neat motions tossing his sweat stained clothing into the hamper. Shuuhei simply stood and watched, enjoying how the intense, almost grim blond moved when he wasn't conscious of others.

Kira looked up at him. The blue eyes were clear, quiet, intent on him and only him.

Shuuhei smiled and walked over, pulling his own clothing off with practiced motions. He quirked a grin as he saw Kira take a slow deep breath, and he bent to kiss the other man slow and solidly. Kira kissed back, solid and strong, hand sliding up into Shuuhei's sticky hair, pulling and tangling a bit. He slid out of his kosode and shitagi, dumping them on the floor, anywhere, and Kira's hands were on him.

"Do you ever wonder?" Shuuhei whispered against Kira's lips.

"Wonder what?" Kira asked and kissed along Shuuhei's jaw line, his hands and arms pulling Shuuhei down onto the bench with him. Shuuhei straddled the bench and Kira turned and put his legs over Shuuhei's even as his mouth continued kissing, licking the sweat from Shuuhei's throat.

Shuuhei's head went up at the insistent touches. "Do you ever wonder what might have happened if they'd stayed?"

Kira paused, he straightened and his blue eyes met Shuuhei's as Shuuhei straightened to look back. "Yes. I do."

"What... what do you..." Shuuhei suddenly couldn't meet that level gaze. "What do you miss the most?"

Kira suddenly shook his head. "I don't know and I'm... I don't want to think about that now. I have you. I have a duty to perform. I have something I must defend. That should be all I need, now. War, battle is ugly, despairing, and I need... I want something to balance that, not more bitter memories."

Shuuhei looked at Kira, mind clearing. He reached up and put his hand against Kira's throat, thumb wrapped around, fingers into that sticky hair, and he pulled Kira close for a hungry, solid kiss. Kira's legs wrapped around Shuuhei's waist, and his hand found the warm shower wand, and hot water sluiced over both of them, slicking skin, warming aching muscles, and finally cleaning them both.

Kira sighed happily as Shuuhei's hands found the soap and then the muscles of Kira's chest and shoulders. When his eyes opened again, he grinned up at Shuuhei. "That's better. Can't spend the rest of our lives looking down, now, can we?"

Shuuhei laughed, "Yes. You're right. The view's so much better up here."
Tags: bleach, fanfic, writing
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